Posted in April 2024.

To raise healthy children, it is important to give them healthy caregivers. Far to often, we try to parent from a deficit. We try to do what we believe is right for our children when we need healing for ourselves. Until we find it, we will muddle around in the “parent trap” with broken hearts and lives, unable to give our children the guidance and nurture they need to succeed. The inner child lives in each one of us and is the core of who we are as people. The inner child is molded by the directions we receive in childhood that teach us how to parent our own children. Painful, traumatic experiences, along with a lack of nurturing by dysfunctional parents, leave deep wounds in the inner child, and this, in turn, contaminates adult behaviors.

“You cannot pour from an empty cup.” -Kidkrazydad

Some signs you have a wounded child might include that you:

• Have a deep feeling that there is something wrong with you.
  
• Are a people-pleaser?
  
• Are a rebel and feel alive when in conflict with someone else?
  
• You are a hoarder
  
• Are not able to let go of possessions and people
  
• Experience anxiety with something new
  
• Feel guilty for setting boundaries
  
• Are driven to be a super-achiever
  
• Are ridged and a perfectionist?
  
• Have problems starting and finishing tasks?
  
• Exhibit constant self-criticism
  
• Feel ashamed at expressing emotions
  
• Feel ashamed of your body
  
• Have a deep distrust of anyone else
  
• Avoid conflict, no matter what the cost
  
• Have a deep-seated fear of abandonment

If you recognize yourself in many (not necessarily all) of the items above, then there is a high chance that you have a wounded inner child. Please care enough for yourself that you take the time to heal YOUR inner child first. Learn to give your wounded inner child all the love, respect, and dignity you deserved when you were young.

Healthy parents raise healthy children.